Landmark: Listen to Someone Mindfully
| Landmark: Listen to Someone Mindfully | |
| Landmark: Listen to Someone Mindfully | |
|---|---|
| Beacons | Association |
| Realms | Engagement |
| Lenses | Interconnectedness |
| Guides | People |
The Landmark of Listen to Someone Mindfully is a wonderful practice where you fully devote all your attention to another person. The main points are to give the other person all the time they need to say what they want to say, and to pay attention fully to that person and what they say. This practice is related to Mindfulness and Other-Centeredness, but the end result is an increase in Interconnectedness. This Landmark is within the Realm of Engagement, and is part of the Beacon of Association, more specifically the Lens of Interconnectedness.
Landmark Lookouts:
- Mindful Listening: Can you pay mindful attention to what another person is saying?
- Other-Centeredness While Listening: Can you pay such close attention to another person that you are able to forget yourself completely?
The first technique is straightforward and involves simply practicing Attention while listening to someone.
- Practice paying attention to ...
- the tone, emotion, energy, inflection, or any quality of voice you notice
- the topic as if it is the most important thing in the world
- the opinions expressed, and mentally feel the great value of the other person's wisdom and knowledge
- Notice if you have an urge to interrupt, or just an eagerness for "your turn" - relax that need until it goes away
- Whenever there is a pause, enjoy the pause for its own sake and quality. Let that pause linger, not anticipating more conversation, but welcoming it if it does come.
- When the other person asks for your engagement, give it to them fully, focusing on responding to their topic, their energy
The second technique is a little more advanced, and is related to the Lens of Other-Centeredness. The idea is to pay Mindful attention to the other person in such a way that allows you to Unlearn the Self.
- As you listen, imagine the person as if they are the only person in the world (including yourself!)
- Allow your own opinions and thoughts to soften, and feel the sense that at least in The Now, the words you are hearing are the only words that exist.
- Allow your own judgement and your entire self to evaporate and discover that person is the new center of the universe. Feel that recentering, feel the real knowledge that they are experiencing emotions and thoughts, and urges and needs. Note that they can feel their own body, and they can focus their attention on sounds and sights from their own perspective and driven by their own needs. Finally, allow yourself to become them for even one blink of an eye.